Charlie Brown joins Chelsea FC academy, awful puns ensue

Chelsea’s academy has signed the improbably-named striker Charlie Brown from Ipswich Town. At only 16 years old, Brown will keep Chelsea’s pundits and jokesters busy for years to come.

Ipswich Town academy prospect Charlie Brown has signed for Chelsea’s academy, after snoopy-ing around by the Blues and London rival Arsenal. While Brown’s age precludes a transfer fee, Ipswich Town is entitled to future compensation. If Brown grows into a Chelsea regular or the Blues are able to sell him for a hefty fee, Ipswich Town may only receive peanuts compared to his ultimate value.

While Brown was not yet Ipswich Town’s security blanket for the future, his transfer is a loss to the Championship side’s long-term planning. Charlie Brown joined Ipswich Town’s academy as an under-10, and made his under-21 debut last year. He scored his first goal as a U21 in his first match at that level.

With his move to Chelsea, Brown is pulling the football away from Ipswich Town. He had just signed a two-year contract for Ipswich Town’s academy, before leaving for Cobham.

Despite his two appearances for Ipswich Town’s U21, Brown can expect to return to the U18 level for Chelsea given the Blues more extensive and more talented youth squad. With the Blues he will gain considerably more experience in England’s domestic youth tournaments and UEFA’s youth tournaments than he would with his childhood club.

Like most Chelsea youth, Brown will likely see regular playing time at the U18 and U21 levels. If he is still with Chelsea as he approaches his full-time professional years, he will probably be sent on loan for first-team experience.

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Seeing another Chelsea youth – and a striker, no less – be sent out on indefinite loan spells will be another moment of good grief for Chelsea fans. The hope that Antonio Conte will be less of a blockhead than his predecessor in his youth development policy is one of the many sources of optimism around the club these days.

OK, we’re done now.