My campaign to be Chelsea technical director: Day 3 – Munich
On day 3 after fictitiously taking over as Chelsea Technical Director, Barrett Rouen travels to Germany to chase Bayern Munich’s Robert Lewandowski.
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The papers in London have been going on about the amount of money we’ve spent in the past couple of days. I can’t be bothered with them. We have spent a large sum of money, set records even, but the books are still in order and we’ve done so within reason. The paper can say what they want. They have never liked us anyway.
Munich has long been a favorite city of mine and in my theories on how to run a football club Bayern Munich are one of the examples. Do I think the Bundesliga is a little weak competitively? Yes, less so in recent years but, overall, yes. That said, one of the reasons it is that way is the tireless, almost shocking dedication to dominance of it’s one major team Bayern Munich.
I’m in Munich today to ask some questions and as per usual try and secure a player for Antonio Conte. With Diego Costa soon leaving on a loan to Turkey before his eventual transfer to Atletico Madrid the only players that we have on the books are Loic Remy, who will be out hopefully within the week, the 18-year-old Kylian Mbappe and the Man, the Myth, the Michy.
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That simply isn’t enough. For a real assault on all fronts this year we’ll need experience and the player we really want for that is Robert Lewandowski.
Lewandowski, the 28-year-old Polish striker is reportedly upset with his teammates. It wasn’t helpful for him to make public statements about their lack of support for him and yet he did so anyway. He’s incredibly well rounded and can finish with both feet while being quick and possessing a good level of physicality. I also like that at his age he won’t too long stand in the way of Tammy Abraham. He’s also of a similar stature to the young man and I’m hoping he will be able to mentor him moving forward.
I eventually make my way to the Sabener Strasse, Bayern Munich’s training ground. It is about as Bayern Munich as Bayern Munich could ever be and thus wildly intimidating. As I take a seat in the conference room having been showed in by a supermodel-esque secretary, Manuel Neuer walks through for training. Each and every single one of his robotic gears clicking and clanking as he walks through the halls. I knew it. I knew there was no way that Germany went from Oliver Kahn to an even better keeper without robotics. Damn. Damn. Damn.
Finally the cappuccino I asked for arrives with the same sort of efficiency one expects out of a six series BMW M-type. Finally, Bayern Munich technical director Michael Reschke arrives and shakes my hand with the sort of vice-like grip of a man trying to intimidate.
“Chelsea will not be intimidated, we did you in your own stadium with Roberto Di Matteo at the helm and Ryan Bertrand on the wing HA!” I think to myself. I definitely do not say that.
The topic we’re here to discuss is one I know he doesn’t want to. Lewandowski has been brilliant in Munich but it does appear his time is up. The offer Chelsea would like to make is £55-60 million up front followed by £10m, £5m and £5m the following years. A total of £75-80 million.
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He’ll want more than that and there will be some fiddling but we’re not going more than £2-4 million higher than that. The other option is two equal payments of £40 million. That is how Juventus broke up the deal for Gonzalo Higuain from Napoli. Juventus set the bar for 28-year-old forwards with that purchase and this offer is more than fair.
Following this conversation I’d register interest in both Arjen Robben and Arturo Vidal. With Eden Hazard injured Chelsea will need another forward but we don’t need one who is going to cost too much or be around forever.
Arjen Robben will bring a lot of experience to our younger leaning squad and my eventual hope will be that he joins the coaching staff following his retirement. If he could be bought for anything around £12 million I’d sign that deal today.
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Vidal would be a good signing but at this rate the Chelsea midfield is getting a little packed. I can’t forget about Nathaniel Chalobah and Lewis Baker who will be joining the team too.
Concluding that deal I’d leave with only Lewandowski in the end but will continue to ask about Robben. His homecoming could fit for many reasons. Now, having spent roughly £190 million in up front fees, it’s time to head back to London and conclude a few pieces of outgoing business.
The squad is beginning to take shape and with very little time left to get the players acclimated to their new club before the season starts, there’s no time to waste.
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My general theory is you want the players settled in at home for a fortnight before they begin competitive matches. That’s about how long it takes for home and bed to feel as they should and to get your sleep cycle in order. You’ve had to do at least one week’s Sunday shop, gone out to dinner in the neighborhood and experienced life a little bit longer than would be a typical vacation. These sort of details are what win leagues and Champions Leagues it’s about time somebody other than Conte fretted over them.