Chelsea Halloween tales, Part I: Nightmare on Fulham Road
Some people are afraid of spiders or snakes, others of heights. We’re most afraid of waking up in an alternate universe where Tottenham win trophies and Chelsea languish under Arsene Wenger. Read our Chelsea Halloween stories….. if you dare!!!!
Maybe Antonio Conte doesn’t sleep after a loss because he is afraid that David Luiz will drift off the back-line and haunt his dreams. That happens to a few of us, along with some other Chelsea-related terrors….
The Fall of the House of Conte: Kevin Peacock
Having taken Chelsea FC to the highest of highs by winning the quadruple, Roman Abramovich feels his time at the club is done. There is nothing else to achieve. His work in London has been completed. There’s only one way the club can go. His parting shot as he exits the door is to fire the most successful coach in the history of modern football.
That’s not quite the last thing he does, though. Just prior to handing the club over to a consortium headed up by Jermaine Jenas, he installs the club’s next manager. Having succeeded in passing his coaching badges – without merits – Michael Emenalo is deemed to be the man to lead the good ship Chelsea on its merry way.
With the help of his trusted side-kick Marina Granovskaia, the two set about dismantling the Chelsea team. With Jenas and his fellow directors looking for an instant profit, the first team are sold and replaced by a bunch of kids from Vitesse Arnhem.
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As things at the club go from bad to worse, the new Chelsea board decide to steal the ground from the supporters trust and opt for a ground-share with near neighbours Queens Park Rangers.
As there is so little left of the original Chelsea set-up remaining, at a hastily arranged board meeting, it’s deemed appropriate for the club to drop the ‘C’ from their name and be ever known as Hellsea Football Club.
Nightmare on Fulham Road: Travis Tyler
Back in ancient times (June 2003), Roman Abramovich had a choice between buying Chelsea FC or Tottenham Hotspur. He chose the former, but in the darkest nights I wake in a cold sweat having dreamed it was the latter.
In those nightmares, the point of divergence was in 1996. Instead of hiring Ruud Gullit as player-manager, Chelsea stole Arsene Wenger out from under Arsenal. They proceeded to buy young talent with little upside as opposed to the older maestros that they did in reality.
When the nightmare reaches 2003, Abramovich sees a struggling Chelsea and a high-flying Tottenham Hotspur. He buys Tottenham, who win the league the next season with manager Jose Mourinho in charge.
The remainder of the nightmare occurs in a flash. Arsene Wenger is finally sacked in 2010 after failing to win any silverware at Stamford Bridge. New manager Brendan Rodgers adds character and attacking flare to Chelsea, getting them to their highest finish in third in 2014. Since then, they have finished lower and lower every year, despite strong starts where they “put the pressure on”.
Meanwhile, Spurs win almost a trophy a season, but Abramovich fires manager after manager. The latest man in charge is Max Allegri, who has had combative matches against Antonio Conte’s Arsenal.
The nightmare ends in 2017, with Rodgers being on shaky ground and Sean Dyche linked to Chelsea as his replacement. I wake in a cold sweat and once the shaking and vomiting stops… I remember the reality.
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Football is a game of what if’s and turning points. Seemingly small decisions can change everything. This nightmare serves as my reminder of that, and how Chelsea should be grateful that Roman Abramovich made the correct decision.