Chelsea’s deadline day history: Zeroes, few heroes, only one Papy
2. Papy Djilobodji (Nate Hofmann)
Arrive: 1 September 2015, Depart: 21 January 2016
Chelsea appearances: 1
Having arrived from Nantes for £2.7 million, the Senegalese defender was about as uninspiring a signing as one could imagine. In hindsight, the move was the perfect foreshadowing of Chelsea’s floundering 2015/16 season. He was unwittingly the harbinger of a dark period at Stamford Bridge.
To be fair to Djilobodji, he deserves none of the blame for the club’s failures on the pitch that season. Like, literally, none.
Papy Djilobodji registered one inconceivable single minute as a Chelsea player, replacing the similarly ephemeral Radamel Falcao in injury time of a 4-1 victory over Walsall in the League Cup. Let that sink in. I can (just barely) hold my breath longer than Papy Djilobodji took the field for Chelsea FC.
It’s a commonly used trope in sports conversations to watch certain athletes and think “pssh, I could do that.” 99.999% of the time, it’s ridiculous to actually consider that to be true. However, in this one case, almost any tangible object (and likely a number of intangible ones) could legitimately argue they could produce the same impact which Djilobodji provided Chelsea.
The only other instances in which we can even be reasonably confident he ever actually donned a Chelsea kit were his three bench appearances: two league matches against Manchester United and Tottenham, and a League Cup match against Stoke City. He deftly straddled the border between professional athlete and Carlos Kaiser-esque conman.
In the next transfer window, Papy Djilobodji was no longer a Chelsea player. The club loaned him to Werder Bremen, where he ironically started every match he was eligible for, tallying two goals and an assist along the way. He was subsequently sold in August to Sunderland, who were preparing for their journey toward the depths of the football league system. Sunderland bought him for £8.55 million, netting Chelsea a hilarious £6 million or so in profit.
Papy Djilobodji charted a magnificently unique trajectory for himself over the course of his career. Chelsea should consider themselves fortunate to have had the honor of harboring such an enigma, even if only for the most fleeting of moments.
3. Kevin de Bruyne (Hugo Amaya)
Arrive: 31 January 2012, Depart: 18 January 2014
Appearances: 9
Kevin de Bruyne arrived at Chelsea in 2012, a very promising young player who could have formed a deadly partnership with his countryman, Eden Hazard. Although de Bruyne was not the player he is today, he certainly showed his potential during preseason games. The attacking midfielder was capable of making deadly passes, shooting from distance and placing dangerous crosses into the box.
In short, he showed the roots of the strengths he would use to hunt Chelsea every time he secured a Manchester City victory.
However, for one reason or another, Jose Mourinho did not see enough in de Bruyne and did not make him part of his squad. Or maybe Mourinho saw too much attacking from the Belgian and concluded he would disrupt the classic defensive balance of his tactics.
The bottom line is his purchase could have been one of the greatest in Chelsea’s history. With de Bruyne in the center or drifting to the right and Hazard on the left, the Blues would have been unstoppable. It would also have blunted the constant threat Manchester City now wield.
By keeping Kevin de Bruyne, Chelsea would not only have a more balanced midfield, they could have shifted the balance of power in the Premier League. The ultimate one who got away.